'Doppelganger Week' Reveals Insecurities

A good doppelganger?  Courtesy of Georgia LoShiavo.

A good doppelganger? Courtesy of Georgia LoShiavo.

The American Psychological Association released a report yesterday over their apparent concern for “the mental well-being of all Facebook users” because of what they called, “Doppelganger Week’s insidious effect of making people feel more attractive than they actually are.”

In their report they stated that there was an excessive degree of misrepresentation on the part of vain and misguided Facebook users. The good thing, according to the report, was that psychiatrists are going to have a lot more patients to treat, most of who have a high degree of narcissism and/or friends who are just complete liars. “We always knew America had a self-image problem,” president of the APA said, “but we never expected they would have a profile image problem.”

Many individuals on Facebook were against the picture alterations though. One user said, “I was so excited when I searched for classmates in my network and saw all these hot babes so I added them all as friends. But now their pictures suddenly got ugly.”

The Screen Actors Guild was also angered by the misrepresentation. David Smith, president of the Guild, said in an official release, “Most of our wonderfully attractive actors are disappointed by the fact so many fatsos, lardos and repugnant self-centered individuals thought they were as attractive as a real celebrity.” In addition to this bad news, President Obama declared a state of emergency. He considered doing a second State of the Union because of the movement but stated he was too depressed to even get on stage. Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook, said, “It was fine when they had their Pokémon, but this goes too far. A more appropriate movement would have been, Doppelganger Week – Zoo Animal Edition.”

The movement did not incense everybody though. The National Mirror Corporation said, “It looks like most consumers do not have mirrors.” The American Optical Association followed this up by stating, “This means that people aren’t just missing mirrors, they are also missing glasses.” And in a report by a major website consortium, a majority of the dating websites stated, “On our sites, it has always been Doppelganger week.”

This entry was posted in News and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to 'Doppelganger Week' Reveals Insecurities

  1. Lane Hill says:

    Great article. I love the last line.

  2. Lane Hill says:

    Oh, and update your blog.

  3. Ryan McDermott (The Writer) says:

    haha thanks Lane. I’ll get the blog post up pretty soon.

  4. J August says:

    This is like the 20th time that I’ve seen this picture, and it still cracks me up.

  5. Thanks for your update.. can U please send me your Facebook profile I can also search “Many individuals on Facebook were against the picture alterations though.” :)

  6. Jason says:

    Facebook should be called “Fakebook”. It’s a place for people to who they really AREN’T.

Leave a Reply