Ill-conceived protest held

Protest!  Protest!  Protest!

Protest! Protest! Protest! Courtesy of Google.

The Students for Sensible Drug Policy ineffectively attempted to disrupt the day-to-day business of Southwestern University by staging a sit-in at the Debbie Ellis Writing Center last Thursday. According to SSDP spokesperson Beau Konger, the sit-in was meant to “serve as an expression of our frustration at the Administration’s ill-conceived policy change as well as to bring attention to our rights as individuals who have a voice within this institution.” The demonstration, which began at 4:20 p.m. and lasted until midnight, was described as “mildly annoying” and “somewhat inconvenient” by the two students who visited the center during those hours. One of the students, sophomore Kera Kingsley, was on her way to edit the final draft of a paper when she witnessed the demonstration. “It was odd to see so many people in the Writing Center. It was somewhat upsetting because I thought I would have to wait a while to have somebody look over my paper, and then I realized I was the only one in line.” Kingsley added, “It was kind of irritating to have to step over people, though.”

The group, which was formed in response to the now-infamous “drug scare” incident earlier in the month, is part of a nationwide organization that advocates drug legislation reform, focusing on  college campuses as both a place for recruitment and a “proving ground” for policy implementation.

According to the group’s president, Amie Wolfenkreneck, a number of places were considered before the students reached the ill-advised decision to demonstrate at the DEWC.

“At first we wanted to sit-in at the Business Office,” stated Wolfenkreneck, “but we were all scared of the two ladies who work the desk. Then we thought about staging it at Korouva, but we realized that everyone already did that anyways. Finally, we decided to do it at the Debbie Ellis Writing Center because Ian wanted to work on his paper, and then that moron forgot it!” DEWC proctor, James Allen, praised the demonstration, claiming that he “finally had something to do.” Allen described chatting with group members, a number of whom were in his Intro. to Anthropology class, as well as partaking in a rousing game of Uno with SSDP Vice-President Bill Maplewood. “The demonstration didn’t really disrupt much of anything,” Allen said. “In fact, it made my job a little bit more tolerable. I was thinking about quitting so that I could get a serving job at Applebee’s, but all of the excitement last Thursday has inspired me to stick it through until the end of the semester.” When asked for a comment about the sit-in, Dean of Students Mike Leese expressed mild surprise, stated, “Huh, nobody had really said anything about that. I guess I can look into it, if you want.”

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5 Responses to Ill-conceived protest held

  1. elbarto says:

    Is this a serious article? If it is, they should really think before they do these things. They’re not going to accomplish any thing like that.

  2. elbarto says:

    nevermind

  3. elbarto is stupid says:

    Hahahaha elbarto, you raging moron

  4. elbarto says:

    go suck a dick and die, asshole!

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